Hemingway: How courage and depression go together

This article is well-intended, but egregiously judgmental and woefully ignorant:

http://www.npr.org/2011/07/02/137540700/after-50-years-remembering-hemingways-farewell

If it weren't for the inane babble puzzling over why Hemingway lived so intensely, this line would be the Winner of The Most Fatuous Statement award: 

"...in January 1961 he told his wife, Mary, that he could no longer write a single good sentence. And Hemingway would only settle for great ones."

It wasn't a question of settling for less than great, it was a question of how important it is to fulfill your purpose and dig some meaning out of life, even amid the unbearable. That purpose and meaning was taken from him, under the mistaken guise of treatment. 

Hemingway got electroshock therapy for his depression; a common side effect is to knock out your language abilities and cognition, sometimes for months and sometimes forever. The one thing that made his life endurable -- writing like himself -- was taken from him. 

Depressed people have more courage and determination than their non-depressed cohorts. Studies are finally being funded that verify this (which I'll dig up later. Feel free to nudge me with a comment.) 

Think about that next time you curl your lip over suicide. It's not about courage. It's about unbearable pain and a degree of mental crippling that puts a valid life out of reach. 

Waiting and working at it until things improve is a reasonable thing to do: Hemingway waited and worked at it for  40 years, though with so little real hope for treatment. Talk about courage! It's unthinkable how much courage he brought to bear on his life. His intensity and wild behavior were directly related to making his life bearable -- and his work more compelling. Check his quoted remarks on that subject. What's between the lines is breathtaking. 

The article's remark about suicidal lineage is true, but poorly understood. A suicide in the family has the powerful effect of making suicide less unthinkable. There is often a genetic tweak associated with it, but that's not all there is. The thing to know now is, we are not our predecessors; we can do more. Far more. 

Hemingway died before we developed SSRIs, SNRIs, and a tremendously improved understanding of neurochemistry, behavior, nutrition and psychodynamics. We have more options now. Lots more. Waiting and working at it is a real success path now. 

Be good to your depressed friends. You probably have no idea what they're capable of, when they can be well again. Help them persist. 

It's the most important thing to do: persist. A valid and bearable life is a reasonable thing to hold out for. Only death bars the door to healing. Things will change. 

Just a sip: Nanotubes, conductance and immunology

One of the most expensive and brutal treatments I've tried was the SCS (spinal cord stimulator) trial. This involved hammering two metal-laced widgets the size of drinking straws into that tiny, sensitive space entirely surrounded by bone which we call the spinal cavity. The one that's usually fully-filled by a mass of busy, sensitive nerve tissue.

My arms hadn't hurt so little in years. My spine, back, neck and head had never hurt so much in my entire freaking _life_. At the mere rememberance, I still feel the shoulder, scapular and upper-back muscles twist themselves into that ghastly position that caused the least pressure against my cord. My neck is going to be cramping the rest of the day. Wish I hadn't mentioned it.

So yeah, that was bad. I wrote Medtronics a bunch of notes from the nurse/patient/biogeek/engineer perspective. I have seen no indication that they did anything but circular-file them, so I feel free to discuss it now. They've had their grace period.

There's no reason for such flat-out stupid, ham-handed, ignorant engineering. I've tried to see an upside to the current SCS tech, and I just can't.

Shoving titanium into someone who's allergic to surgical steel? Check your MSDS sheets, gentlemen. Cramming cubic centimeters into a space that's painfully sensitive to pressure changes of cubic millimeters? Hang on, who thought _that_ would be a good idea?

Welcome to the future of implantable devices -- especially those going into immunoreactive, sensitized systems:

Meet the carbon nanotube: body-friendly, weavable, conductive, cheap, easy to work with. Does its job on, easily, one thousandth the scale of silicone and wire.

Why is this on my mind? (Gentlemen, look away and hum.) First day of my cycle after a month of progress in rebuilding basic endocrine responses. EVERYTHING is supersensitive and hyperreactive. I want a carbon nanotube *body!*

Best I can do is coconut water. It really smooths out the bumps, if I drink enough of it. Here's to 21st century tech, and hoping it makes it into something as profitable as biomedicine!

A job well begun ...

I have CRPS-1/RSD/causalgia, and when your condition has more than one name, it's a bad sign. I was a nurse, I was a tech writer, and I remain fascinated by health and technology.

Some parts of my brain have blown gaskets, but examining the science relating to neurology/immunology/endocrinology -- and mulling how it could work in real life -- seems to go just fine. It's appropriate to both my professions that I want to track, document, and share what I learn.

You're invited to watch and engage in this interesting journey. It's taking place at an unimaginably rich, burgeoning age of technological development and biological understanding.